Sanctuary
by Nymphadora-CullenBAU
Summary: Submitted for the Emily Prentiss Mystery Challenge. As Ian Doyle draws closer, Emily seeks safety and the comfort of an unlikely friend and co-worker. Will it become something more? Crime, Suspense and a Reid/Prentiss Friendship/Romance Pairing. COMPLETE!
1. Coffee Shop Comforts

_**I decided to try my hand at this... I may continue it depending on how its recieved and how the storline goes (And even then, I may just make it AU).**_

_**I don't own Criminal Minds! :D**_

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_Courage is found in unlikely places. ~J.R.R. Tolkien_

:...:...:...:...:...

_"...Am I in danger?"_

_"We all are..."_

:...:...:...:...:...

"_We all are… We all are… We all are…"_

Sean's words still echoed in my head. They haunted my dreams, lingering in every dark cranny within my mind. They whispered the promise of a confrontation during the day; I was haunted by the images of the members of my team, my friends, co-workers and family, dead. The people that I cared about and worked with everyday, sprawled on the floor, their blood pooling around their bodies; it was an image that stalked me, branding itself onto my eyelids.

I didn't say anything to them. What would I say? What _could_ I say? I couldn't just go up to Hotch and Rossi and say, _there's something that wasn't mentioned in my file. I did some work for Interpol and_ _my former boss there just informed me that a dangerous man from my past has escaped from prison and is coming after me, which means that there's a possibility that all of you could die because of it…_

Yeah, they would all take it really well.

A week after their initial meeting, I got a call from Sean. There was no greeting, and no pleasantries; Sean got straight to the point.

"_Doyle's been spotted in the country,"_ he said. _"Tipping and his team are going to try and waylay him, but you may want to keep your eyes open, Emily. In the meantime, I'll send a man to watch you, but until he gets there, you're on your own."_

After I had hung up with Sean, I began walking. I had to get away, go somewhere. I found myself at a small bookstore/coffee shop populated mainly by an older woman and a Georgetown student with an iPod blaring what sounded like some rock band. I ducked into the SciFi section to get away from the stares of the clerk/barista, a teenager with three piercings on her ear, two more on each of her eyebrows and one on her nose and lip. My nose was assaulted with the scent of printed pages and coffee, and I immediately relaxed.

I remembered afternoons as a child, when I'd sit in the library of one on the many houses I lived in as a child, or when I'd sneak into my father's study, how I would just sit at the foot of one of the numerous bookshelves that housed the countless books, and I would relax and take in that same scent that filled my nostrils now. As I got older, I began taking down the books on those shelves opening and reading them, usually finishing them in the span of an afternoon or two. Those books, those rooms… they were my sanctuary. But that was so long ago, back when I hadn't had to worry about Ian Doyle, back when I was innocent….

"Do you need help finding something?"

I jumped, my reverie broken; I knew that voice.

"Reid?" I asked, turning toward the speaker.

Indeed, there was my young genius co-worker. Today he was wearing a casual white collared shirt, minus the tie, jeans (I had never seen him in jeans before), as well as his usual Converse with a tan leather jacket that seemed likely to match his tan leather messenger bag, usually considered a third arm. His hair was unruly, like it had been for the last couple weeks, and the ever-present dark circles under his eyes seemed even darker than normal, making him look paler than he usually did. Under his arms he carried a stack of thick books.

He smiled slightly at me, setting his load on an empty shelf where I assumed that the books in his hands were supposed to go.

"I volunteer here when we aren't on a case," he explained in response to my unasked question, gesturing around the aisle they stood in. "I come here sometimes, when a case gets to me. I find it quiet here; it's a sanctuary for me when I need to… get away."

I nodded in understanding; I knew what it was like to want to get away, to go somewhere safe. I was feeling it now. The overwhelming fear, the need to be somewhere safe...

"Emily, are you alright?" he asked suddenly. Concern was etched into every facet of his skin. I felt his hand on my shoulder, and I gazed into his concerned eyes. I had never realized how soft they were. My heart suddenly flipped in my chest and my stomach bottomed out somewhere around my navel; the next thing I knew my eyesight was blurry as tears collected in my eyes and fell down my cheeks.

The walls I had so carefully constructed as a child were coming down faster than Morgan could kick down a door, faster than Reid could shoot off a statistic, faster than Garcia could find an UnSub….

Before I could stop myself I had buried my face into Reid's chest. He stiffened for a moment before I wrapped my arms around his thin shoulders and a moment later I felt his arms complete the embrace. His hands flowed along my heaving shoulders, running up and down my back, rubbing, patting, comforting.

"It's alright, Emily," he whispered. "It's alright… I'm right here… I'm here…"

I wanted to cry. Usually I'd be angry at myself for showing this kind of emotion in a public place, but once I started crying, I couldn't stop. I cried for my lost childhood, the baby I had aborted at fifteen. I cried for my friend Matthew, for John, for my mother and father. I cried for Gideon, for JJ, for Garcia, Hotch, and Morgan. I cried for Reid, and for Sean. And I cried for me. For what was waiting for me outside the doors of this corner bookstore/café, for whatever torture Ian Doyle had in store for me.

I heard him whisper something to someone outside our bubble and a moment later I was being led to a corner table in the café portion of the store. The backs of my legs hit the edge of a chair and I sat; his body followed mine into a chair that had been placed next to mine seconds later. A cup filled with a hot liquid was placed into my hands, with a whisper of "On the house."

I wanted them all to go away, to just leave me alone with Reid. I wanted the world to disappear so that it was just us, so I wouldn't have to feel like a victim. Tears still ran down my face, but the sobs had turned into hiccups, the heaving breaths to little gasps. I still felt his hands on my shoulders. And then, his voice spoke to me, quiet, soothing, helpful and caring.

"Can you tell me what's wrong?"

I was almost tempted to not tell him.

Almost.

As I told my tale he listened. I stared into his eyes, and he looked back into mine. I told him about my work with Interpol, how Sean and I trained together. How I caught Doyle the first time and put him away. How after that case I quit, went to the FBI. How I still kept in touch with Sean. And then, how Sean had contacted me about Ian Doyle's disappearance. How I knew Doyle was coming for me, and that he was within the area and how I felt that I may not have much time left.

By the time I was done, he was watching me. His eyes watched me, explored my face as I dried the streaked makeup from my face, and wiped the tear tracts from my eyes. His hands grabbed mine, rubbing soothing patterns into the skin of my wrists.

"We can help you, Emily," he insisted. "We won't let him near you."

"You can't tell the others," I whispered, a stray hiccup escaping from my throat. "They must never know! You shouldn't even know."

"But I do," he said fiercely. "And I promise that if you only want me to know, I can keep it to myself. I will do everything in my power to protect you, Emily."

You don't have to-"

"But I want to," he insisted. "And I will."

And he said it with such finality that I just closed my mouth and ended the discussion.

I remembered what he had said, about coming to this place when a case had hit him hard. His sanctuary, he had called it.

What it possible, perhaps, that I had found mine in him?

:...:...:...:...:...

_Friendship is the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weight thoughts nor measure words. ~George Eliot_

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_A/N: I hope you liked it! Wish me luck! :D_

_And please review! ;)_

_*~N_CBAU~*_


	2. Purple Iris

**_Glad to see you all wanted more! In case you're wondering, the last chapter took place about a week after "The Thirteenth Step;" this one takes place right after the end of "Sense Memory." I'm also sorry I didn't get to this until now; I had classes all week, then last night I was hanging out with some friends... If you haven't heard of the "goffik" story "My Immortal," consider yourself lucky._**

**_Anyway, I have a family thing to go to, so I'm just posting this quickly; I'll reply to reviews soon!_**

**_I don't own Criminal Minds!_**

~…~

_You don't get to choose how you are going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you are going to live. Now. ~Joan Baez_

I stood outside my apartment, Sergio tucked into my arms and my Go-Bag slung over my shoulder. The memory of the purple iris and the strong emotions of that day still surged through me. I could still hear the wind rustling the trees, the birds singing; I could still see the flowers, the cars… and Ian. The look on his face, the way he had watched me get into the car and drive off.

"What do we do now, Serge?" I asked the black cat in my arms. "We can't go back into the apartment, Cheryl is allergic to cats, and Brianna's out of town visiting her mom." I paused, adjusting the strap on my shoulder. "So… Where do you want to go?"

Sergio purred softly, a low "mrrp" coming from deep within his body. I sighed.

"At least I know where your loyalties lie," I said, digging into my pocket for my phone, hitting the appropriate buttons as I did so. It only took a moment for him to answer.

"_Emily!"_ Reid chorused into the phone. _"Did you change your mind about going to_ Solaris_?"_

"Actually, Reid," I admitted. "I- I need help."

He paused for a moment before speaking again. _"Is it… Him?"_

"I think so; he sent me a flower. A single purple-tipped iris; we used to grow them in the garden back in France."

"_Are you in your apartment?"_

"No; I just walked out. My alarm had been tripped and I thought he might still be there."

"…_Meet me at my place. Let's say in about… 20 to 30 minutes. Do you need anything?"_

"No," I answered. "I have my Go-Bag and Sergio; I'll see you when I see you."

"_Bye."_

As soon as he hung up I stowed my phone, shifted my grip on Sergio and headed for the stairs.

…:...:...:...:...

Reid's apartment reminded me of a cross between a college professor's office, a college student's dorm room and the typical male bachelor pad.

As soon as he let me in, my eyes fell instantly on the fake skeleton sitting in a white rocking chair in the corner of the entry way. It was wearing a porkpie hat, and a corncob pipe was clenched in its teeth. There was a small, plainly decorated kitchen that the door opened into. The living room was decked in book shelves, save for a single kiwi green wall with a maroon couch and matching loveseat. A circular wooden coffee table sat in front of the couch, with papers, textbooks and an Amazon Kindle strewn around the surface. The floor was wood, with a shag carpet of blue, red, yellow and green. An opening in the bookshelves revealed a medium flat-screen television on standby.

I set Sergio down to explore his new surroundings, and he immediately wandered into the kitchen.

"The bathroom's down the hall, along with the guest room," he said. "There's also another room that I made into an office. The guest room's right through here…"

He opened a simple wooden door to a small aqua-colored room with a fully-made bed, a half-full bookshelf. The bedspread was a light blue to match the walls, and the shaggy carpeting was a dusky purple. The ceiling was also a dusky purple to match the carpet, complete with glow-in-the-dark stars scattered across it. Over the bed, I saw a purple dream catcher with matching purple feathers and light blue beads.

"It actually used to be my library," Reid explained. "But after Georgia, and the Anthrax case, Morgan moved all the books into the living room; he had liked the couch, but he felt uncomfortable lying on it. Gideon told me something similar after Georgia. To be honest, I agree; I bought that couch at Goodwill, but it's only ever really good for sitting, not sleeping." As he spoke, I set my Go-Bag on the edge of the bed, on a spare blue blanket folded up by the footboard.

"And the bathroom is right behind us," he added, gesturing back out into the hallway to two sinks resting on a counter between two more wooden doors. I opened one to find a shower/bathtub combination; I assumed that the other one would hold the porcelain throne, confirming that thought as I opened the other door. The floor was tile, many small white tiles interspaced with tiles of black, red, orange and yellow.

"Where's your room?"

By now we had reached the entry way again; Sergio was inspecting the skeleton in the rocking chair when I had spoken, and dashed over to us, giving me a look that said he was demanding to be picked up again, which I eagerly complied to.

In answer to my question, Reid pointed to a wall with a door next to the couch "It's through there," he admitted, moving away from me and toward the wooden door; he opened it to reveal a tan colored wall with a bed resting by the wall closest to the window. Above it hung a tan-colored dream catcher similar to the purple one in the guest room. But it wasn't the wall or the bed, which was a full-size bed with a golden comforter and matching golden pillows. It was the chalkboard that covered the other three walls.

Each chalkboard had math equations, scientific equations, diagrams, random musings, statistics, quotes and quirky drawings, as well as scattered pieces of paper of varying size and color with more pictures and more quotes taped to the boards.

"What do you think?" he asked. "Sorry if it's a bit messy; it isn't much, but I call it home."

"It's a charming place," I admitted, setting Sergio down again; he stretched and shook his head before licking his lips and letting out a soft and plaintive "Mrow."

"Um, Emily," Reid began, staring at the cat. "Has Morgan or Hotch told you about the 'Reid Effect?'"

I smiled slightly. "As a matter of fact, they did," I said. "But… Serge likes everyone. He's a very social cat." Indeed, as I spoke, Sergio made his way over to Reid and began rubbing his face and body along my friend and co-worker's pant leg before looking up at Reid with his big eyes and emitting another "Mrow."

And then, to my complete surprise, Reid crouched down to stick his hand out in front of Sergio, who began nuzzling his hand; I heard a loud, rhythmic purring sound as Serge move closer to Reid, once again rubbing against his leg before leaping onto his shoulders and nuzzling his ear.

I grinned at the scene in front of me. "Looks like Sergio and I are gonna hang with you for a while," I pointed out.

He nodded. "You're more than welcome," he whispered, a smile on his face.

Neither of us spoke for a moment while Sergio calmly kneaded his way across Reid's upper back a few more time before leaping from his perch and dashing into the living room. As soon as he was gone, Reid stood up.

"How does Chinese sound? Or would you rather have pizza?"

_Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light. ~ Albus Dumbleore_

~...~

_Please review!_

_*~N_CBAU~*_


	3. Oncoming Storm

_**This chapter is actually before, during and after the events of 6x15; I'm sorry it's so late, I was really bust with school and such, plus I missed the first five minutes of the episode, so I had to watch it a few times to get a hold of what was happening...**_

_**Again, I don't own Criminal Minds!**_

….

_Lightnings, that show the vast and foamy deep, The rending thunders, as they onward roll, The loud winds, that o'er the billows sweep- Shake the firm nerve, appal the bravest soul! ~ Ann Ward Radcliffe_

I spent that weekend in the purple guest room of Reid's apartment, and I remember that being the best weekend of my life. The two of us camped out in the small living room area all day Saturday, watching Star Trek, Star Wars and Doctor Who, while Sunday was spent reading; he had to catch up with his philosophy class, and I gladly left Sergio to his company while I made my way to the bookstore/coffee shop, picking up a mocha carmella decaf latte and _The Canterbury Tales. _

Sean called me while I was walking out the door.

"Emily speaking," I stated.

"_It's Sean, Emily,"_ he said wearily.

I nearly dropped my coffee and book in surprise. I could tell by his voice that now was not the time for pleasantries. "Is it Doyle?" I asked. "Do you know anything about where he may be going?"

A soft sigh from the other end of the phone confirmed my fears. _"It was just confirmed that Doyle is in the country, and that he isn't alone."_

"I found flowers outside my apartment." I told him. "I wasn't sure if he had actually left them for me, or if they were delivered by… an associate of his."

"_What did you do?" _

"I'm staying with a member of my team until I can check into a hotel." I replied. "It's better for me to stay with someone I know, lay low for a while, you know? At least until I know for sure that Doyle is heading this way."

"_And he is okay with that?"_ Sean asked. _"Your teammate?"_

I glanced around at the street before answering. "Unless Doyle outright threatens him or another member of my team, I will stay with him regardless."

"_I understand,"_ was Sean's reply. _"Also, Clyde is in DC; he heard about Doyle and came to me. I told him to stick with you; he should be in your neighborhood within the week. I've also been trying to contact Jeremy and Tsia; neither one of them have returned my calls. I'm not assuming anything yet, but I am concerned."_

"I'll call Tsia," I said. "Maybe I can convince her to take your call next time."

"_Perhaps,"_ Sean mused. _"And Emily… Take care of yourself."_

~…~

The next morning found us at the BAU again; I had managed to call Tsia before the briefing, and everything seemed to be going well until I mentioned Lauren Reynolds in front of a member of my team. Namely, it was in front of Reid that I had mentioned her.

The thing was that, even though I had told him about Doyle, the estate and Sean and his team taking me away when my cover was blown, I had never mentioned to him that my name had been Lauren Reynolds during the 14 months I had spent undercover as Doyle's lover.

They weren't supposed to know, least of all Reid.

I brushed it off, telling him that Laura was a friend that had died in a car accident, but Reid's genius mind, plus his deduction skills and the information I had already given him, there was no doubt in my mind that he would put the pieces together sooner rather than later.

I was right.

Tsia called me while we were on the case; Jeremy was dead, killed while on his run with a substance that was without a doubt injected into his veins by Doyle. It hurt her, too; she had been planning to marry Jeremy, and it had seriously looked as though they'd have their happily ever after. But that was long over.

"Dump that cell phone, and get home safe," I told her as we wrapped our conversation; I closed my phone only to feel eyes on me. I turned to the window to see Reid watching me, his gaze constant. We made eye contact for a moment before he shifted, looking back down at the file he was looking over with Garcia and Seaver.

I was starting to wonder if Reid didn't already suspect that my story was false, if he was worried about me. At the very least, he knew there was something fishy happening. He didn't say anything, he didn't have to; I could feel his eyes boring into the back of my head as we closed the case in Los Angles.

That night, upon our return, I found myself alone in the BAU. My files were done, my paperwork turned in and ready for processing. I had just turned everything into Hotch and was making my way out via the conference room when my phone beeped. I fumbled with it for a moment, expecting a text from Tsia telling me she was safe, or maybe from Clyde, wanting to check up on me. I wasn't expecting Sean to contact me, and Reid would usually call instead of text. I unlocked it only to find my worst fears realized.

**Unknown Caller: See you soon.**

After leaving the base, I checked into a hotel; I kept telling myself that it was easier this way, that Doyle would never hurt Reid if I wasn't there. But I couldn't shake the feelings of fear brought forth from an oncoming storm….

_What's comin' will come and we'll meet it when it does._ ~_J.K Rowling_

….

_A/N: I hope everyone enjoyed 'Coda' the other night; I thought it was awesome! :D_

_And hopefully the chapter for that one will come soon..._

_Thanks to my awesome reviewers HannahlovinCM, lolyncut, Nono31, WTFhehe, Spark 17, and xXDemonic-AngelicXx, as well as anyone and everyone who has subscribed and/or favorited! You are all wonderful and amazing! Thank you! :D_

_Nono31: Thank you, and I'm glad you like the dynamic between Reid and Prentiss; I hope you liked it this time around, even though there wasn't much._  
_WTFhehe: A blue freesia... Thanks for the heads-up; the last time I took a plant science class was my junior year of high school. I'll fix that ASAP._

_Please review! I love it when you do! :D_

_*~N_CBAU~*_


	4. A Confession of Pain

_**Sorry for the long wait; I kinda fell behind!**_

_**Anyway, I'm just going to post the last two chapters now, so I can focus on school and my other stories. Also, my OC, Dan... He's a last minute replacement for Sean; I wrote this before 'Lauren' aired, and by the time I got it on my computer, it was common knowledge that Sean was dead. Basically, Dan is like Garcia and Reid merged, only with more computer smarts than book smarts.**_

_**Again, I don't own Criminal Minds! :D**_

...

_Revenge is a confession of pain ~ Latin Proverb_

:…:…:…:…

Fear was the wrong word to say when it all came down to this situation. Worry was also a useless word. Terror, horror, desperation… I could think of a few more.

Ian Doyle had been here. He had come up to me, sat with me, talked with me… threatened my family.

He had called each of them by name, mentioning their evening plans. Derek and Penelope, watching their movie. Aaron at home with Jack. Dave and Ashley playing video games. And Spencer… But Doyle had called him by his title, Dr. Reid.

As soon as Doyle was out of sight, I was on the phone. I called Dan first. Dan was our former technical analyst, the one member of my old team that Ian Doyle had no information on. A man about my age with apparently undiagnosed Asperger's Syndrome, he had always kept to himself, never leaving his computer room except for food and bathroom breaks; his only communication with the outside world was from chat rooms, forums and cell phones.

Dan was the only member of our Interpol team I had kept in touch with throughout the years, something Sean had never known. I had told Dan everything about my experiences with the team, and he knew them almost as well as I did. I had wanted him to meet Reid and Garcia someday; now I wondered if that would ever happen.

He answered the phone on the first ring, concern evident in his voice. Usually I texted him; calling was for emergencies only in our circles.

"Emily…What-?"

"He threatened my team," I choked out. "Doyle threatened my team!"

Dan was quick on the uptake. "I'll send you someone; they'll be there in five," he growled.

"What about my team?" I asked.

For a moment there was nothing; it was like time itself had stopped. And then Dan spoke. "I can call Clyde or Tsia and assign them to members of your team, but their top priority is you. I can't get a hold of Sean, but I could also get members from another team on them, but that would take time-"

"Something we don't have, Dan!" I cried. "He knows exactly where they are, and what they're doing…." I paused, biting my lip for a moment before continuing. "And… I think he may already have a target."

I heard Dan sigh. "Explain."

"I met with him just now," I began. "He mentioned every member of my team by their first name, save for one."

There was a pause. "Give me a name and address; I'll hack satellite surveillance systems on every government satellite and watch them tonight."

"Spencer Reid, age 29. He lives at Westcraven Apartments on Francis Key Street."

"Alright," Dan replied "And Emily? Go home."

"…Okay," I replied, hanging up. Then I called Tsia.

"Emily?"

"I need to meet you and Clyde on the Red Line sometime tomorrow morning," I ordered harshly. "Board it anytime before 9 AM; I'll text you the train number."

"We'll be there, love," Clyde's voice echoed in the background. Then I hung up on them, too before grabbing my coffee and walking briskly toward my apartment

My phone burned in my pocket as I went; it begged me to make one more call, to speak to him… But I couldn't, not when it may put him in danger. I'd seen him die once before; I wasn't willing to see him die again, and in a more permanent way….

:…:…:…:…:…

The room was dark, empty. The dark form of Sergio was nowhere to be seen; I remembered with a jolt that I had left him at Reid's apartment; the skeleton in the rocking chair had gained a new friend in my new cat.

_He can have Sergio, _I thought sadly as I made my way through the apartment I called home.

I quickly showered and dressed; there was no time to sleep as the sun was coming up soon, and I had to be on the Metro to meet with Clyde and Tsia.

Once again I glanced toward my cell phone. _It'll only take a second,_ I reasoned. _Just pick up the phone and dial the number… He'll understand._

"No, he won't," I whispered aloud; I wasn't going to allow Reid to be at the mercy of a IRA operative like Doyle. If I had my way, Doyle would never lay a hand on Reid.

I pocketed the phone; we could talk later, the two of us. Right now I had to be on the Metro, waiting for Clyde and Tsia so we could make a game plan.

I would not let Doyle get me just yet….

:…:…:…:…

_By taking revenge, a man is but even with his enemy; but in passing over it, he is superior. ~ Unknown_

….

_A/N: Thanks to my awesome reviewers vampiremuggle, lolyncut and HannahlovinCM! You are all so amazing!_

_I'm hoping for some more reviews; if anyone's still out there reading this story..._

_*~N_CBAU~*_


	5. Honesty

_**Don't forget to read chapter 4!**_

_**OMG, AJ's coming back! She signed a two-year deal! **eek!****_

_**And... I went and bought the May edition of Vogue yesterday, and Tweeted about how awesome Matthew looked in his hat... And he retweeted me! Not Kidding! He did! And I wasn't even expecting him to, either! It was so cool! I have been walking on air all day! I have this humongous grin on my face! :D :D :D :D :D**_

_**Anyway...**_

_**I don't own Criminal Minds!**_

….

_If you truly want honesty, don't ask questions you don't really want the answer to ~ Proverb_

:…:…:…:…

I waited until the elevator doors had closed on the law enforcement assembled within the bullpen before breaking down in tears. Even now, in my darkest hour, I wouldn't let them see me cry.

Sean… Dead.

Jeremy… Dead.

Tsia… Dead.

All of them dead because of me. Because of what I had done when I was undercover with Doyle.

And the team… They were in danger. And there was no way that I was going to endanger their lives. Hotch's words echoed in my ears.

Hotch had lost his wife; he was all that Jack had left. He was a good man, a good father. He was the leader of the team, _my _team; they needed him more than they needed me. And it would destroy Hotch if anything happened to Jack. And Jack believed his father was a superhero, someone who would always defeat the bad guys; there was no chance that I would let his father be defeated by a villain that made Foyet look like Lex Luthor.

I wasn't going to take a father away from his son, or a son away from his father. But I had done it before, I remembered.

Declan…

_Don't think about that,_ my mind hissed. _If Interpol can't find them, then Doyle will never find them; you hid them so well that it'll be impossible to find them without the proper channels. But just in case they're compromised, hopefully Garcia will trace the pictures back to Dan's computer…._

I forced my thoughts back to my team.

Rossi, the writer… He had come on barely a year after I had, the founding father of the BAU. We were surprised to see him even return; I still remembered the day Morgan, Reid and I had tried to profile him based on his office. Well, Morgan and I; Reid had been dragged into it. But he had been there for all of us. I remembered after Matthew's death, how he had stuck by the case I thought we'd had. We had taken to it, and we had figured it out, despite the clear opposition between us the families and Father del Toro. And the Chad Brown case, even though I had snapped at the horror of finding out that one of my friends, my team… my family, had been infected, and then he had "Emily-d" me, our bond had strengthened, and he became the kindly older uncle I had always wanted, the father that mine had tried to be, despite his continued travels abroad.

Morgan, my rock. He was the first to notice something was wrong, the first to try to get me to speak about what was going on. All he wanted was to be my confidante, the brother he was trying to be for the rest of us. He never felt complete unless he was protecting someone, or letting someone tell him about their secrets, fears and despairs.

Seaver, the new girl… I was supposed to be mentoring her, answering her questions, giving her a voice in this unit until she could hold her own, stand up and be a good a profiler as the rest of us. But with Doyle hanging around, I couldn't do that, because I had to protect her, protect them. I had to keep Doyle away from them; I knew what he could do, and I didn't want to walk into a crime scene with one of their bodies dominating the scene.

Garcia… Sweet, lighthearted PG; she was the one who always saw the good in people and the light at the end of the tunnel. What would my departure do to her? Tear her apart? Harden her resolve? She had always told me that she always wanted to see the good in people, and JJ had once told me that every time we went away, she, Garcia, would hope and pray and will her "babies" to come home to her.

And Reid… Oh, God, Reid… He was the most innocent member of the team, the most insecure and the most open-hearted. He wore his heart on his sleeve, but always in a good way. In many perspectives he was still a child; confiding in me about the headaches was proof of that, but I would keep his secret. I had promised him. But he was more than a child; he was also the bravest man I could have ever known. He had stared down death, unwilling to choose one of us to die. He had walked up to a school shooter without his own weapon. He had emerged from a burning chapel like the newborn phoenix from the ashes of its last burning. He had confronted his father when a case seemed to point toward William Reid being the UnSub, and had tried to save a young man from his female alter-ego.

I realized in that moment that the men I had worked with in the last few years, in this last part of the decade, were more man than some of the men I had known my entire life.

And as the elevator doors opened up into the lobby of the FBI Academy, I was sorely tempted to just push the sixth floor button and ride back up and let Doyle come to me, see if he was willing to get through me to hurt my team….

But then I thought of Reid, how he always cared for his mom, and I remembered how he had bonded with Sammy Sparks not that long ago. I wasn't about to let the world lose someone as pure, or as heartfelt as SSA Dr. Spencer Reid.

I wouldn't… because I loved him, because the world needed him, and not me. I could love him, but I could not have him. He would go on, while I stayed here, another player, a secondary character in this story. We weren't for the ages, but rather, just a bright flame that would flare up in the darkness, unnoticed by the rest of the world.

:…:…:…:…

_Honest hearts produce honest actions. ~ Brigham Young_

…

_A/N: I don't think I'll stop smiling for the rest of the week! :D :D :D_

_Please, please review! _

_Lots of love,_

_*~N_CBAU~*_


	6. Lies Told in Silence

_**Don't forget to read chapters 4 and 5!**_

_**Last chapter! Also, before I end this story, I have a quick annoucement:**_

_**I'm having a Season Six Finale contest! And you are all invited! Basically, this will be what YOU want to see happen in the Season Six Finale! **_

_**Starting Today, April 18 and going until Sunday May 17, 2011, you can write whatever you want to see happen at the end of Season Six. Does Ian Doyle come back? Is there more to Seaver than meets the eye? How does JJ return? Will we discover the source of Reid's headaches?**_

_**RULES:**_

_**1: All stories MUST be submitted by 12:01 US Central Time on Monday May 18. NO EXCEPTIONS!**_  
_**2: All stories must be ONE chapter in length; you can continue it once the contest is over.**_  
_**3: You can submit as many stories as you want, but I'd prefer a total of three per person. That doesn't mean you can simply write three; if you have more ideas, you are welcome to submit them, but be sure to pick only three for judging. (Ex: If you write five, pick three of the five for me to judge, and tell me your decision by 12:01 Central Time)**_  
_**4: Stories will be judged with a poll on my profile page, that you will be free to vote on, and also by PM if you want, I will notifiy the winner via PM and annouce it here on my profile page.  
5: Once you submit your story, send me a PM with the link and I will find it and post it on my profile page.**_

_**The prize will be that I'll write a Oneshot or Multi-Chaptered fic of the winner's choice. Any characters, pairings, situations you want (Although if it's sexual in nature, be prepared for situational torture, because I can't write anything sexual in nature to save my life)**_

_**If you have any questions, please PM me.**_

_**And one last thing...**_

_**I don't own Criminal Minds.**_

…

_The cruelest lies are often told in silence. ~Robert Louis Stevenson_

:…:…:…:…

My body ached. I was groggy, sick, lost….

Pain. I was in pain.

I remembered Boston… The Black Clover… Declan… Doyle…

_Doyle!_

I gasped, fighting to sit up.

"Easy, Emily," a voice whispered gently and there was a hand on my shoulder.

I knew that voice. I cracked my eyes open.

"JJ?" I whispered hoarsely.

The blonde nodded. "I trust you slept well? How do you feel?"

I sucked air between my teeth. "I feel like I was shot, tied up, branded, kicked around and then stabbed by a table leg. How about you?"

She smiled grimly. "I'll be better once you're on your feet again," she replied gently.

I turned my head to see Clyde leaning against the door, watching me through expressionless eyes. His arms were crossed and one foot was braced against the frame as he leaned back on it while the other supported him on the floor.

I moved my head closer to the other side of the bed, where there was an empty chair. My feverish mind sped up, racing. _There should be someone there._

_There should be someone from the team there. Hotch. Rossi. Morgan. Seaver. Reid. Garcia. Someone should be there!_

"Where are they?" I asked.

I saw JJ's eyes tighten, but she pretended to have not reacted. "Who?"

I glared at her. "You know who," I answered. "The team should be there. _Our _team, JJ. Don't you remember them? Hotch, Morgan… How about Garcia? Surely you remember Reid, too? You used to call him 'Spence.'"

I felt the bottom of my stomach drop and instantly regretted my words when JJ's eyes filled with tears. _Did something happen?_

I thought back to my meeting with Ian Doyle, right after we had reunited Sammy Sparks with his mother. How he told me he was basically watching my team, and that he would hurt them if I was to tell them anything about him, Valhalla or Lauren.

_Was someone dead? Did someone die because of me?_

"Ian Doyle disappeared the night we rescued you, Emily," JJ whispered, snapping me back to the present. "He's in the wind, and we believe that he may be biding his time, looking for another chance to attack."

"So everyone's alright?" I asked. "Rossi, Reid, Garcia and the others… they're alive, right?"

JJ nodded. "But the State department, and Clyde believe that there is a chance that, if Doyle were to return… he could use someone close to you to lure you into bringing Declan out of hiding."

Doyle's words from that night in the park so long ago echoed in my mind again. _"Does the lovely Penelope know you're here? I guess she's too busy watching movies with Derek, while Aaron sits at home alone with his son. And why didn't Dave and Ashley invite you to their game night? I guess they thought you'd be on the Metro, with Dr. Reid. Now that one has some quirks."_

"_Come near my team, and I will end you!"_

"…What did you tell them?" I asked.

"They think that you never made it off the operating table; save for me, Clyde and Hotch, the whole world thinks Emily Prentiss died in surgery while at Boston General. Clyde will tell Interpol the news of your death, and then he'll escort you to Europe where I'll meet you at a later date to discuss where we'll go from here."

I couldn't speak for a minute. I was dead. _I _was dead. Emily Prentiss. Emily Prentiss, the daughter of diplomats, former Interpol agent and member of the elite Behavioral Analysis Unit, was dead.

But my death was being overshadowed. There was one other thing on my mind.

"How did they take it?" I asked. "My death."

"Rossi nearly lost it; he only just kept it together," JJ admitted. "Ashley looked numb; I don't think she believed it at first. Morgan was nearly in tears, and Garcia was crying and was inconsolable." She paused, and I saw tears in her own eyes for a moment. "I don't think I've ever seen Spence cry before, but when I told him, he…" she trailed off, staring at the floor. "He said that he never got a chance to say good-bye, and he… I never want to see him like that again; I almost told him that you weren't dead, just so he would stop."

By now there were tears in _my_ eyes; I had never expected to hear that Spencer Reid had cried; it was like hearing that Morgan liked the color pink, or that Strauss was bringing cookies to the BAU. I couldn't imagine it, and no matter what I did, there was no way for me to see it.

"And… my funeral?" I asked. "When is it?"

"This afternoon," JJ replied, and I noticed that her outfit was a black dress, with her hair pulled into a bun. "I chose Reid and Morgan to be two of your pall bearers; I hope you don't mind."

_Actually, I do mind,_ I wanted to snap. _I do mind having to wake up hearing that I'm dead. I do mind having to hear that my friends are crying over a lie. I do mind having to go into hiding until Ian Doyle comes out of hiding so we can catch him._

But I remembered my harsh words from earlier, and stayed silent. Instead, I asked one simple question.

"Can I- I mean, can Emily- come back someday?"

JJ stared at me sadly. "We'll see."

:…:…:…:...

Paris was beautiful; the lights, the people and the sights. It was everything I had imagined it to be. When I had been here as a child, all I had seen was the fact that it was another city, another posting for her. For me, it had been square one, having to make new friends, prove myself to a new batch of local children, and try to make it through another year of school until my mother was moved again to another city in another country. I had never stopped to marvel at the beauty of the city; it truly was "The City of Lights."

And now I stood in my new apartment, with two new cats and a small cage full of birds. Spencer, the tabby, leapt onto the bookshelf and curled into a ball, purring as he watched me open the envelope JJ had handed me outside the café. His fellow feline, Garcia, a calico, had strayed toward the food dish; I saw her eyeing it hungrily for a moment before turning her dark eyes to me and crying out a sad "meow."

The canaries Derek, Ashley, JJ, Aaron, Jason and David, made soft cooing noises from beneath the sheet I had set upon the cage before going out to meet JJ. I realized that my friend would think me insane if she could see the menagerie inside my new apartment, but I wouldn't care; just because I had accepted the results of Doyle's escape didn't mean I had to live with them. I couldn't have the team know I was alive, but I could surround myself with them.

As JJ had said, there were three passports, all of them with my picture. There were also three birth certificates, three driver's licenses and three bank accounts, each filled with over a million Euros.

I smiled at the first name, Isabella Adair. She was from America, but had lived in Italy most of her life. I set that one aside; it would be useful as an alias, but I had no love for it.

The second name, Ariadne Pond, made me laugh; I remembered the time that Garcia and I had spent an evening at JJ's house watching _Inception,_ which turned into an additional viewing of _500 Days of Summer_ so Garcia could prove that Tom and Arthur were the same person, before she swore that the man playing Paul was Reid's identical twin cousin, and the many nights Garcia, Kevin, Reid and I would spend at my apartment watching _Doctor Who,_ and the one and only time JJ had joined us was the one time Reid had brought his brand new Sonic Screwdriver, and Kevin had brought his replica Master pocket-watch. There had been a slight… disagreement about who was the better Time Lord and after that, all watches and screwdrivers were banned from our viewing parties. We had just finished watching the newest season together when I had heard about Ian Doyle escaping from prison.

It was the third identity that made me tear up, however. I guess JJ knew that I would still want a reminder of the team with me wherever I went; she might as well have put a small yellow Post-it with the words 'Just for you' on the inside cover of the passport. I silently thanked her for making this identity; if I couldn't be with him, I wanted to have a small part of my friend to keep close.

The name on the passport was Emilia Reid.

:…:…:…:…

_In your life, you meet people. Some you never think about again. Some, you wonder what happened to them. There are some that you wonder if they ever think about you. And then there are some you wish you never had to think about again. But you do. ~ C.S Lewis_

...

_A/N: And that's it!_

_**glances at chapter** There is way to much author's note up there!_

_Please don't forget to review! _

_And excuse me for a sec, but... I'M SO LOOKING FORWARD TO A.J'S RETURN! ...Now that that's out of my system..._

_Don't forget to check out my other fics! :D_

_Love, _

_*~N_CBAU~*_


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